Tell A Different Story

Diana Bailey Essential Motion Pilates By  Guest Writer, Diana Bailey

Acceptance is the starting place. It has nothing to do with being a “door mat” by allowing others to make decisions that are yours to make. It is not about giving up, giving in, or tolerating particular circumstances and behavior. Acceptance is seeing something for what it objectively is, so you can be free to decide how you want to respond. It is the ability to drop or question your beliefs in order to act wholeheartedly. It does not magically appear or disappear. You choose it.

There’s a joke that makes the rounds in Colorado every winter that is a great example of acceptance:

Know how you can tell you’re driving in the snow with a Colorado native? Because the car’s sliding sideways into oncoming traffic, and they ask you to hold their coffee ‘cause this is gonna get interesting….

Freedom to act comes from the ability to consciously direct the mind to observe and acknowledge what is happening right now. That’s acceptance. No resentment, no why me? No more the entitled approach of I deserve this, but I don’t deserve that. No he should have, or I could have. No leap to the aftermath of mopping up a coffee stain on car upholstery. Just this: Here we are. This is it, and NOW WHAT?

The story becomes entirely different. That’s what.

Acceptance underpins creativity because it is the receiver; the heartfelt seeing of a person, place or thing for what it is without dressing it up or tearing it down. It is the simple realization that there is no real control of any outcome…. especially for anyone or anything else. That understanding alone will make a positive difference in whatever the outcome actually is.

This simple spiritual principle dramatically changes every situation without adding any personal drama. Imagine one guest or family member in the room at a holiday gathering who was truly still inside…no drama. Talk about a social magnet. Acceptance remains clear that there is no reason to make anyone else’s drama yours. What for?

Acceptance abides with the personal responsibility that lies behind a choice to do or not do, think or not think, say or not say.

For me, this simple practice is moving forward at peace with what is here, what was before and what may or may not be. That’s a “now what?” that makes getting up in the morning a great idea, an engaging and expansive look at being here and doing what I’m doing today with all that I am.

 

 

 

“Peace can only be found in right now.”

Peace and bhudda…And What will that Bring You?
Sorting out the Story.

By Featured Guest Writer Diana Bailey

It takes practice to train the mind to let go and engage right now as real. Human beings spend a lot of time telling stories about reality rather than seeking to genuinely embrace

What is real? Living in the wreckage of an imagined future devastation, or getting stuck in events from the past, steals the present.

This widely cultivated habit of judging, speculating, criticizing and regretting that has taken most of us a lifetime to entrench and refine seems to be less about observation and more about summation. It is the pervasive belief that if we can just figure it all out, there will be peace. Ask yourself if this approach has ever actually brought you peace? Of course not! It is an axiom of life that problems do not get solved with the same thinking that created them.

Many of us enjoy and cling to the idea that everything has a place and a place for everything.
That’s true if you’re talking about a desk and office supplies. So naturally, we expand this to organization of the self. The mind wants to know in order to control and limit feelings of insecurity. If it’s all in a box or category, it has been decided. Forever! There is no chaos, no unpredictability, and no unknown. All the pictures get filed for instant recall and programmed with their companion behavior. Then we carry the script around for constant reference so we can react. The price paid for this “automated” approach to the world is huge. Underneath it all is the desire for connection and peace.

Addressing this fear of the unknown by endlessly fussing over how to place events in a personal scrapbook—already overflowing with a lifetime of judgment and speculation about our supposed relationship to everything—is overlooking one simple fact:

This action puts limits on life that life didn’t put there.

It steals the joy of discovery and drowns creativity. The blinders get so big it’s hard to see anything at all. Nothing is new or different or special or genuine or surprising or worth the risk anymore. Perpetuating a rut with this type of belief system is equivalent to living in a grave with both ends knocked out.

How can there be wholehearted engagement if the deeply held belief is that to define, categorize and dismiss– or to imagine, speculate and pretend– answers everything?

Peace can only be found in right now.
Life is rich in experiences, while material things come and go. The depth and richness of living comes with being willing to meet life on life’s terms rather than constantly attempting to get life to sign off on your contract.

 

This question of …”and what will that bring you?” …is a way to sort out what you truly desire from your current picture of reality. It provides the invitation to explore the difference between superficial wants, your deepest needs, and the purpose behind your actions. It is not just for deciding whether or not to buy a car, but that may be a great place to start using it.

Checking in with your self is the key. It keeps the dance of life alive without buying in to the ebb and flow of circumstance. The action that arises from genuine engagement of this sorting effort can, with time and practice, create an abiding outlook on the nature of it all.

Oh yeah, and there is peace….and what will that bring you?

 

Previously Published January 2013